A Good Night's Sleep

We bought a new bed!  Hooray!  Most of you will not understand the significance of this purchase, but it is indeed momentous.

First, I should share that for the past 18 months (and prior to that when we slept at ‘my’ apartment), we have been sleeping on a full size bed. This may not seem like an issue to many, but one would need to understand our sizes to really appreciate our ability to share this space. My husband is 74” tall and probably 22” wide when lying down. I am 63” tall and probably 26” wide when lying down (my friends refer to them as ‘child bearing’ hips). So together, our dimensions lying down are 74” x 48”. A full size bed is 75” x 54”.

Second, the mattress we had been sleeping on was a hand-me-down that was probably about 30 years old. My obsessive nature led me to cover it with an egg crate and mattress pad as well as a double sheet, but none of that could prevent us both rolling into the middle of the bed every night and finding it almost impossible to get out of the bed every morning.

Needless to say, sleeping had not been that comfortable. We had no choice but to be in each other’s space, and David likes to cuddle and spoon – both of which I try to avoid at all costs.

One might wonder why we were in this situation for so long, and this is honestly all my fault. I am terribly indecisive when it comes to what I consider a major purchase. After research and testing, reading and trying things out, I freeze. I suppose it all aligns with my general commitment issues (and yes, I somehow made it to marriage – anything is possible).  Instead of making a choice, I simply stop.

When I purchased my apartment three and a half years ago, the oven did not work. So I checked out some ovens online, went shopping, and then learned to use my crockpot to the best of its ability. Finally, this year, my husband had enough of my barbecue chicken and we bought a new oven. And I couldn’t be happier!  It’s perfect and I can bake again. Then one day David bought us a bed frame to match our bedroom set and I knew what was coming. We drove to Sleepy’s, and an hour later we had purchased our first QUEEN size bed together. And now, we can sleep happily ever after. If I don’t give my husband enough credit, here it is – thank you for making me uncomfortable for 20-60 minutes, so I can be comfortable every night in our home.

By the way, did I mention my car died?  Let’s see how long this purchase takes…

Ring His Neck

My husband always forgets to wear his wedding ring. Yesterday, I came home and it was hanging on our fruit stand (which is where we both hang our rings if we are doing the dishes – the good news is he was doing the dishes), and I decided that I would play a trick on him. I have now hidden his ring and will wait and see how long he takes to tell me it is missing.

Let me back track for a minute, though.

The wedding band symbolizes the eternity of our commitment and love, and shows the world that we are married. Yes, this is important, but this is not what frustrates me about David not wearing his ring. What bothers me is the history regarding this man and rings. When we first became engaged, my husband was jealous of my ring and wanted one of his own (yes, he has these girl-like qualities, and I still love him). One day, we were at an Oktoberfest celebration and after consuming some exceptional beer, I went shopping at the vendor stands and purchased him an engagement ring. He wore it religiously. And I didn’t mind most of the time, but occasionally I would be embarrassed by this ridiculous behavior. But he was happy, and that was all that mattered.

Then we went shopping for wedding rings. I found mine at the second store we visited, and he took six months to find his. It had to be perfect – he wanted a specific metal, style, fit, and he must have tried on over 100 rings before he found ‘the one’.  And I went along for the very frustrating ride, but again, he was happy, and that was all that mattered.

We got married and I thought the ring drama would end. But sadly, a month into our marriage, we went out to celebrate my Mom’s birthday and David was not wearing his ring. He told us that he ‘must have forgotten it’. So I took action – I wrote the word ‘taken’ on his left ring finger. I did not want there to be any confusion when the inappropriately dressed women at the casino checked him out while he played the Star Trek slot machine. When we got home the next day, my husband admitted that he did not know where the ring was. After searching for some time, he found it in a pile of laundry, but it had been missing for several days. He was wearing his engagement ring instead (I had not noticed), but he never told me! Obviously I was more upset about the fact that he did not tell me it was missing, than the fact that he lost it.

There have been a few ‘I forgot it at home’ incidents since, and again, my concern is not with my husband actually wearing his wedding ring. I am very aware of the fact that we are married and committed and in love, and certainly don’t need a piece of jewelry to confirm that. However, I will continue to make fun of him for harassing me to buy him a ring, for being so picky, and for always ‘forgetting’ something that was SO important to him. I’ll let you know when he ‘finds’ his ring now…